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First comes doubt, then comes the breakup

conflict and emotional stress in young people couple relationshiDear Harlan: I’ve been in a serious relationship for a year, but I’m having doubts. How do I know when it’s the right time to break up? – Doubting

Dear Doubting: When you have to ask the question, “How do I know it’s the right time to break up?” it’s pretty close to the time you need to break up. Before you do break up, make sure you have people and places outside the relationship. Places will give you things to do independent of your relationship. People will give you a support system. When you have a life that’s interesting, supportive and loving outside of a relationship, you don’t have to be in one. You can work on the issues that make you uncomfortable inside the relationship without the fear of being alone. If the issues can’t be resolved, then you know the relationship is broken.  And then, you can break up.

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