Dear Harlan: It’s not as easy as you make it sound to find someone willing to wait to have sex. Every guy I meet wants to jump into bed. When I tell them I’m not interested in having sex before marriage, they jump to someone else. How can I find someone who is open to waiting until marriage, and how do I bring up the subject in a conversation? How do I find someone from the start who lines up with my religious beliefs? – Waiting
Dear Waiting: Pretend you’re a Duggar woman from “19 Kids and Counting” — minus the family homophobia and intolerance. They are virgin magnets. Take Jessa and Jill Duggar – two virgins who had never even kissed a boy (as reported by TLC). Jessa met Ben Seewald after he visited the Duggars’ church. Ben’s family went to the Duggars’ home for fellowship. The two spotted each other. Jessa’s dad, Jim Bob, made the intro and the two started studying scripture. Then boom! Married. Guess how Jill Duggar met her husband? Two words: Jim Bob (big shocker). Derick reached out to Jim Bob to be his prayer partner during Derick’s humanitarian work in Nepal. Jim Bob introduced Derick to Jill and the two started chatting via text and Skype. Then boom! Married. People with strong values meet people with similar values by doing things that revolve around faith and values. If you don’t have yourself a Jim Bob to fix you up, get involved with activities and organizations that revolve around your strong values. Volunteer, go on a mission, organize local events, and advertise your strong values. Be your own Jim Bob. Spend your time surrounded by men who love not having sex and sex won’t be an issue. Spend your time in bars at 2 a.m. surrounded by men looking for sex and your virginity will continue to be a problem.
→ Write Harlan | → Read More Advice